This is the transcript for Psycho Dad Destroys Nintendo Switch.
Transcript[]
- (The video opens with Jeffrey opening the door to the basement where he finds out that Jesse has food, plates, and a microwave that he has taken out of the kitchen)
- Jeffrey: I fucking knew it!
- Jesse: Are you kidding me?!
- Jeffrey: Are you kidding me?
- Jesse: Is that fucking camera-- Is that on?
- Jeffrey: Yeah, it's on. You fucking took-- Are these my fucking oranges?
- (Jeffrey touches the oranges)
- Jeffrey: You took all the food out of the fucking--
- Jesse: It's closer because I'm down here now, could you back the fuck off, dude?!
- Jeffrey: Oh, well, maybe I want to use one of my plates. I mean, I don't know, you have what?
- Jesse: What about basement plates when people film me when I'm eating?!
- Jeffrey: Oh, I'm so sorry. Well, maybe I want to actually use some of the damn plates we have in the house, what are you doing?
- Jesse: I'm trying to get this shit out of the--
- (Jesse shakes the can of Chef Boyardee and puts it in a plate)
- Jesse: Get out of my way.
- Jeffrey: Is this what you--
- Jesse: It's fucking dinner.
- (Jeffrey films the other room where Jesse was playing his game)
- Jeffrey: Are you fucking living down here?
- Jesse: You have nothing better to do? I've been down here for a while, thanks for caring.
- Jeffrey: Well, do you have anything better to do, I mean, you're like sitting here playing video games eating...
- Jesse: I'm not listening to you, dude.
- Jeffrey: ...process pasta out of a damn can.
- Jesse: It's Chef Boyardee, it's not fucking process, dude. It's fucking good.
- Jeffrey: You got a nice little sausage thing.
- Jesse: Yeah, oh, do you want it?! You want it, dude?!
- (Jesse throws a sausage at Jeffrey as he laughs and Jesse throws a plate)
- Jesse: Oh, did I hit your camera?! It... just stop fucking filming!
- Jeffrey: Jesse, you're supposed to eat the sausage in the box. Did you get what I just said? "The Box." It's like a vagina.
- Jesse: I sleep here, I need to get a-- I need to bring a fucking trash can down here.
- Jeffrey: Oh, you need a trash can? Oh, you have to go upstairs?
- (Jesse shows the sausage to the camera thinking that's Jeffrey's nose)
- Jesse: This looks like your fucking nose!
- Jeffrey: Oh, well, maybe you should just bring the trash can down here, or maybe, do... do you need a bathroom?
- (As the microwave beeps, Jesse gets a fork out of the bag)
- Jesse: Dude, I gotta get back to the game because I'm doing a fucking speedrun right now.
- Jeffrey: Oh, a speedrun.
- Jesse: Yeah. When I pause it but I still consider it when the.. when the.. when it..
- Jeffrey: You doin- doing a speedrun with all your Chef Boyardee?
- Jesse: Whatever. Fucking leave me alone please.
- (Jesse and Jeffery go into Jesse's basement room)
- Jeffery: Yeah? Yeah? Aw Jesus... Oh, what is this?
- Jesse: Jeffrey, what are you doing?
- Jeffrey: What is that, your poop bucket?
- Jesse: No! That's just where I can throw shit away. So when I'm done.. I'm not--
- Jeffrey: ..You throw shit out your ass? Is that what you're talking about?
- Jesse: Shut the fuck up, dude.
- (Jesse starts eating the pasta)
- Jeffrey: How are you gonna do a speedrun with that?
- Jesse: I'm taking a bite, and then I pause in between. But I still consider the- when you pause it.. time in the game. So don't fuck up.
- Jeffrey: Yeah, whatever you say.
- (Jeffrey then films the screen, revealing the game called "Binding of Issac")
- Jeffrey: What is this?
- Jesse: "What is this?" You don't even know? "Binding of Issac", it's one of the greatest fucking games ever.
- Jeffrey: Is this the-- Is this new? Like, why are you not playing Zelda?
- Jesse: Because it just came.. Because it just came out. I already beat fucking Zelda, I put a hundred plus hours and ..did all the side quests and shit.
- Jeffrey: Aw, you ain't-
- Jesse: Skyrim ain't got nothing on that shit, dude.
- Jeffrey: ...Yeah, it dosen't got nothing on that? Uh-huh?
- Jesse: Fuck! Come here, you fucking...
- Jeffrey: What is this? It's like.. Dude, it's like a little fricking baby crying, it's like you. It's like.. It's like.. Ah! Oh, it's actu-ah! Wait a minute... This is YOU?
- (Jeffrey points to the little white person on the screen thinking that's Jesse)